Totally Clueless

(Warning: This post is in Valley girl talk. You’ve been warned.)

If you’re like a 90s kid, then you would totally remember the rad movie ‘Clueless’. It’s like where the pop 90s started. Personally, I loved the fashion, quotes, characters and personalities. Honestly, who won’t want to be in Cher’s group, “are you like for real?”

Not only are the three trios pretty, fashionable and popular, they are also very kind. They’re like totally a triple threat because they have and are everything. Some people have expressed their annoyance with girls like Cher (As if!) but honestly they might just be jealous. I don’t see them as annoying, I’m actually inspired by them. First off, they are so rad and their fashion is the ‘way cooliest’. Secondly, they’re kind hearted and you get to know that it’s really the inside that counts. Especially in this film, the characters are notoriously known to be so Cali superficial, but in reality, they are so chill. The girls try to help other people but just in their own way. You gotta give them like some bonus points, really.

Since I really do love this movie, I got inspired to understand how to look and act like a ‘cluelesser’. No, cluelesser is not a ‘real’ term. I created it to explain a person who is like a character on Clueless.

[Cluelesser (adj. noun) A person who seems to belong in the world of the 1995 film Clueless]

Below, I have created a step by step process on how to be a cluelesser. These are like my opinions and if you try to follow it, you’ll definitely be totally way cool and chill; You’ll be a Cluelesser.

Step 1

Dress the part

  • Matching suit jacket with mini, circle or high waisted skirt
  • Plaid skirt
  • Knee high socks
  • Collared silk or sheer shirt.
  • Silk dress
  • Crop top tee
  • High waisted shorts
  • Bright colors
  • Over sized Sweater

Step 2

Puff the Hair

  • Tease your hair for a lot of volume
  • Toss you hair to the opposite side of your natural fall
  • Very curly hair pony tailed to one side on top
  • Braid uneven spots and toss all your hair into a bun
  • Don’t forget, Lip Gloss

Step 3

Carry the Bag

  • Chanel vintage purses
  • Bright colors
  • Fuzzy textures
  • Halogen prints
  • Plastic or rubber material

Step 4

Work the Boa

  • Black
  • Pink
  • Red
  • White
  • Any Color
  • Any Size

Step 5

Gotta Totally Accessorize

  • Clear and colorful house phone
  • Big bulky 90s cellphone
  • Big hats
  • Circle len shades
  • Fuzzy pen
  • A totally rad room
  • The coolest Cali open car

Step 6

Nothing without the Fur

  • Fur coat
  • Every color possible
  • The bigger the better

Step 7

Talk the ‘way cool’ Talk

  • Replace all very/ ready into totally
  • Say “Like” in almost every sentence
  • “Like I’m so sure”
  • “Super Shady”
  • “That’s chill”
  • “Like no way”
  • “Are you for real”
  • “Totally Buggin”
  • “Way coolest”
  • “Like totally”
  • “As if!”

Hope you find inspiration in the 7 steps of becoming a cluelesser. It would be awesome to totally revamp the old 90s movie into a more contemporary style. Cause us fashionistas have to always like think fashion forward. But most of all, I hope you can find friends with the love for fashion like the girls on Clueless. Like in the movie, when things weren’t going friendly amongst them, they worked things out and at the end of the day, they were totally BFFs.

If you’re inspired by the movie too, please let me know and tell me how you are a cluelesser.

With Love, Victoria S.


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